{"product_id":"be-thankful-i-dont-own-a-taser-t-shirt","title":"Be Thankful I Don't Own A Taser! T-Shirt","description":"Funny, bold, and sarcastic. The “Be Thankful I Don't Own A Taser!” T-shirt is perfect for anyone with a sharp sense of humor and a little attitude.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• Soft, breathable fabric\u003cbr\u003e\n• Comfortable everyday fit\u003cbr\u003e\n• Durable, quality print\u003cbr\u003e\n• Perfect gift for sarcastic friends\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWIDTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCHEST (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34-37\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e38-41\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e42-45\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e46-49\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e50-53\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e54-57\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e58-61\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e62-65\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Goofy Wear","offers":[{"title":"Black Heather \/ S","offer_id":68044578947174,"sku":"5308052_8923","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ M","offer_id":68044578979942,"sku":"5308052_8924","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ L","offer_id":68044579012710,"sku":"5308052_8925","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ XL","offer_id":68044579045478,"sku":"5308052_8926","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":68044579078246,"sku":"5308052_8927","price":28.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 3XL","offer_id":68044579111014,"sku":"5308052_8928","price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 4XL","offer_id":68044579143782,"sku":"5308052_8929","price":34.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 5XL","offer_id":68044579176550,"sku":"5308052_12878","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ S","offer_id":68044579209318,"sku":"5308052_4166","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ M","offer_id":68044579242086,"sku":"5308052_4167","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ L","offer_id":68044579274854,"sku":"5308052_4168","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ XL","offer_id":68044579307622,"sku":"5308052_4169","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ 2XL","offer_id":68044579340390,"sku":"5308052_4170","price":28.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ 3XL","offer_id":68044579373158,"sku":"5308052_21456","price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Team Purple \/ 4XL","offer_id":68044579405926,"sku":"5308052_21457","price":34.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ S","offer_id":68044579438694,"sku":"5308052_9395","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ M","offer_id":68044579471462,"sku":"5308052_9396","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ L","offer_id":68044579504230,"sku":"5308052_9397","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ XL","offer_id":68044579536998,"sku":"5308052_9398","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ 2XL","offer_id":68044579569766,"sku":"5308052_9399","price":28.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ 3XL","offer_id":68044579602534,"sku":"5308052_9400","price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ 4XL","offer_id":68044579635302,"sku":"5308052_9401","price":34.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ S","offer_id":68044579668070,"sku":"5308052_4136","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M","offer_id":68044579700838,"sku":"5308052_4137","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L","offer_id":68044579733606,"sku":"5308052_4138","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL","offer_id":68044579766374,"sku":"5308052_4139","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":68044579799142,"sku":"5308052_4140","price":28.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":68044579831910,"sku":"5308052_5303","price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 4XL","offer_id":68044579864678,"sku":"5308052_5318","price":34.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ S","offer_id":68044579897446,"sku":"5308052_6948","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ M","offer_id":68044579930214,"sku":"5308052_6949","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ L","offer_id":68044579962982,"sku":"5308052_6950","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ XL","offer_id":68044579995750,"sku":"5308052_6951","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":68044580028518,"sku":"5308052_6952","price":28.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ 3XL","offer_id":68044580061286,"sku":"5308052_6953","price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ 4XL","offer_id":68044580094054,"sku":"5308052_6954","price":34.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ 5XL","offer_id":68044580126822,"sku":"5308052_12876","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0745\/6977\/7254\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-mauve-front-6af56068b9751.jpg?v=1794465907","url":"https:\/\/goofywear.com\/products\/be-thankful-i-dont-own-a-taser-t-shirt","provider":"Goofy Wear","version":"1.0","type":"link"}